August 2, 2006
Wusses,
They're Everywhere

Wuss.  As in wussy.  Defined as a weakling, doormat, wimp, or namby-pamby.  Hopefully should you be unfamiliar with “wuss” it’s not because people only whisper it behind your back.

Blender Magazine published their Top 10 Wuss list. Whom did Blender find the Wussiest?   “Sweet Baby James”, sensitive folk singer James Taylor.  Blender, you’re wrong.  James Taylor recorded a duet with Allison Krauss, “How’s The World Treating You”.  Allison Krauss rules. And doesn’t hang with a wuss.

Others on the Blender list indeed deserved being a member of the “Top 10 Wuss’s list.”  First and foremost Rascal Flatts, (if the lead singer doesn’t stop gaining weight they’ll have to change their name to the Pillsbury Doughboys), Example A of what’s wrong with country music today. 

Others on the list include Nick Lachey, ex- husband of whats-her-name with the outstanding moneymakers and the IQ of a tree frog and Kenny G. he of “you hear his songs all the time in the produce section and on the elevator” fame. 

It beats me whether some of the Top 10 Wusses, i.e.Hillary Duff, deserve to be on the list since I know not who they are or what they’ve done.  But I certainly have my own list of Top 10 Wusses. 

Like Larry King, CNN geezer in residence, who has yet to ask a tough question or come to an interview with the slightest hint of preparation. 

Starr Jones, she of fired from The View fame.  I hadn’t a clue what The View was, or is, and all of a sudden this whiner is turning up everywhere, see Larry King above, wailing about getting the axe.  Lady please, you were working in television, an industry that cans people for no reason almost daily.  Deal with it. 

Other members of the “You Big Wuss” list?    World Cup soccer players.  What’s with writhing in agony feigning injury only to immediately return to the pitch, meaning they’re not only a fraud but also guilty of bad acting.  

The Dixie Chicks are world-class wusses.  All their albums are on my I-Pod because they make great music.  But their lead singer insists, “I have opinions too.”  Well, so do Bruce Springsteen, Toby Keith and a flock of other entertainers but they don’t whine in a Time magazine cover article and then bail for Europe when their concert tickets go begging.  If you’re going to mouth off deal with the consequences, other folks have opinions too and they differ from yours. 

Speaking of the Chicks, radio stations refusing to play their hits are also Big Wussy award winners.  C’mon, play the best of the Chicks and when folks call up to complain put them on the air.  Soon you’ll have Chick defenders phoning and you can air the differences of opinion.  It’s called “compelling radio” and has been way absent from the broadcast spectrum for too long. 

But a special “I’m so Wussy” goes to folks wanting the local broadsheet to publish their critical of society thoughts but not allowing the author’s name to be attached to the diatribe.  Opinions are so easy when you don’t have to face anyone who disagrees.  But then I guess “You Said It” gives folks something to do while they await their backbone transplant.  Maybe after the surgery they’ll have the courage to sign their name to a letter to the editor.