March 21, 2007

     Fashion is Fabulous?

What?  It’s a joke, right?  According to a salaries.com survey, and if you knew such a thing as salaries.com even existed you’re way ahead of this kid, the most fabulous job in America is, fashion designer? 

Who’s kidding whom?  Did you ever meet a kid wanting to grow up to be a fashion designer?   What happened to dreams involving work as a fireman, cop, Superman or Brittney Spears squeeze of the week.  A fashion designer?  Imagine asking your grandchild what he wanted to be when “all grown up” and he looks you in the eye and says, ‘Well, Grandpa, I really want to work with taffeta. Or chiffon.”   

Looking over my shoulder while I write, as wives are wont to do, Jan asked, “Why is this just about boys?  Young ladies were a part of the survey and many probably dream of being in the fashion business.”  Well, excuse me, Mrs. Promise to love, honor and just insert commas where they’re supposed to go in a husbands weekly meanderings. According to the survey asking young people their idea of a fabulous job, over 25% of the respondents first pick was fashion design.  There had to be a significant number of male respondents.  And keep in mind, number six was interior designer and event planners checked in at number eight.  This is how America is going to compete with China and India in the coming years; looking fabulous and having meetings start on time? 

Some of the “fabulous jobs” in the survey were indeed terrific. For instance, number two was a surgeon.  I would have been a great surgeon except for three minor roadblocks on the career path.  Passing high school chemistry, the sight of blood causing me to hurl and possessing the manual dexterity of a penguin combined to cause high school counselors to suggest considering something other than medicine.  For instance, how about a career as a disc jockey or radio time salesman, jobs not requiring any real talent.  By they way these two occupations, you must be as shocked as I, didn’t show on the “fabulous” job list.  

Number three was airline pilot.  Good choice.  They make big time money, get to wear snazzy uniforms and rumor has it work about a day and a half a month. Number five was an investment banker.  This also pays well but demands an Ivy League education so one can learn how to spell arbitrage and drink martinis.  Number seven was a p.r. specialist.  No one knows what a p.r. specialist does other than they also drink martinis but are allowed to use spell check on the tough words. Real estate developer checked in at nine.  We’re all aware of a real estate developers duties.  They have weird hair and tell people “You’re fired” on reality TV shows. 

That leaves, and I was puzzled it ranked as low as tenth, the one truly fabulous job on the survey.  No not scientist or engineer but TV weatherman.  That’s right, the world of Butch, filled every weekday at 5 and 10 with Alberta clippers, pineapple expresses and monsoonal flows is thought by teens to be a fabulous job. 

Now if there was just some way we could get TV meteorologists to wear sharp uniforms like an airline pilot and their off hours as a courtier to the stars, they’d leap to the top of the “fabulous jobs” popularity scale.